Approach Women Now! How Many Women Have You Lost Because of These 5 Mistakes?

How to Meet Women - How to Talk to Women
Get Rid of Your Shyness Around Women
Learn How to Approach Women NOW...

From: Carlos Xuma
Monday, 10:14 a.m.

Carlos Xuma, the author of the ultimate program for talking with womenEver since I could remember, I've always been afraid of walking up and talking to women.

I can't explain where the heck it came from, because I have never had a woman throw her drink in my face or slap me - but this crazy fear was always there, and because of it, I felt like I missed out on so many opportunities to meet some amazing women.

My experience usually went something like this:

I would walk into a bar, or a restaurant - or anywhere I might meet an attractive woman - and then I would see HER.

You know, that one woman that just grabs your eye, and you get obsessed - just thinking about what it would be like to talk to her, and maybe hold her in your arms on a date...

And the second I saw this woman and I figured out that I really wanted to meet her, I would experience this total "lock-up" in my brain.

I was frozen to the spot, and I didn't know what to say or do.

I knew I had to go over and talk to her in order to get anything started, but I couldn't seem to find a way to DO IT. I almost felt like someone was holding me back physically, like being pinned to a wall.

Every time I tried to take a step in her direction, my mind would lock up again and I couldn't move or say anything. Even if she was standing right next to me!

(And that was usually the WORST situation because she was right there... SO CLOSE.... within reach.)

Here is another situation I think a lot of guys go through:

Have you ever been talking to a woman for a few minutes, and as the energy of the conversation starts to dip a little (right about where you are running out of things to say) she just looks back to her friends and turns her back to you?

We call this the "back turn," and it's one of those experiences guys hate more than anything. You get that sick feeling of not just being ignored, but de-valued as well.

Even though she didn't actually do it or say it out loud, you feel like she just laughed and called you a loser.

And it makes you feel like dirt.

Have you ever had this happen to you? Maybe once or twice?

Maybe more...?

And the worst part is that you don't feel like it's something you could even describe to anyone else, because you feel like it's your problem alone.

"This is Where Everything Changes Inside Your Head..."

In every one of these situations where I wanted to approach a woman, I noticed that there was this point in time - just a few seconds after I saw her - where if I didn't do something right away, I knew I would not be approaching that woman or talking to her. It just wasn't going to happen if I waited beyond any time at all past that point.

What I discovered later on - and I'll talk more about this in a second - is that if I could just get myself to take ACTION - just say something - that I wouldn't have any problems after that.

And even if I did have a challenge, it wouldn't be anywhere NEAR as difficult as this was.

You see, I'm going to tell you something that a lot of my friends don't even know ...

I'm shy.

I've always held myself back when it came to meeting people and being more outgoing. I just had this unexplainable emotion in my head that would stop me from just walking up and saying "Hi" to a woman I wanted to meet.

I knew on the surface it was SO simple to do, but it felt like it was INFINITELY complicated below the surface. I even thought at one point that I was making this stuff up in my head.

One day I sat down and wondered what it would be like to master that emotion in me - the one that kept me from meeting and interacting socially.

Take a second right now and imagine how different your life would be if you could just manage to overcome this blockade - this barrier - in your thinking that stops you from talking to the women you want.

Just imagine what other people in your life would think about you if you could erase that invisible barrier between you and the moment where you take ACTION...

This is what I started thinking about all the time, because I knew I could radically improve my life if I could just figure out how to seize this moment and just DO IT.

Well, I came up with some things that you will want to know about this feeling, and the art of approaching women.

Here are some other situations that I've gone through that may have happened to you:

You're sitting somewhere having an ice cold beer, and you're talking to some friends. Out of nowhere, a woman passes by that catches your eye, and you can't take your eyes off her.

More than anything, you wish you knew how to approach her, but somewhere inside your gut you get this feeling of fear pressing down on you. Your mouth goes dry...

And before you can pry your butt off your chair, that little voice in your head starts talking to you:

The strange thing is that these thoughts don't come up in words... they seem to come up in emotions, like an invisible force field between you and the woman you want to go meet.

And, as you stand there trying to figure out how you're going to walk up to her, another guy comes up to her and introduces himself and starts talking to her. Before you know it, they're all laughing and having fun.

You missed your shot...

"It wasn't just approaching women that would paralyze me, either..."

Have you ever had something like this happen to you:

"Here's a story you might relate to..."

A few years back, I had a BIG problem: I was single and had just relocated to Kansas City. I was supposed to get married, but that had fallen through, and now I was alone and on my own.

I managed to get a job fairly quickly, but I had NO social network. I had to start again from scratch. I thought it would be easy, just like it was in high-school.

I was in for a rude awakening...

I got along okay for a few weeks, but then I started noticing how many nights I was staying home, drinking beer, and watching the same movies over and over. (I think I must have gone through "Big Trouble in Little China" about ten times...)

Between working at an office with only 4 people and sitting at home playing computer games, I wasn't meeting ANYONE. In fact, it felt like I had fewer and fewer friends because when I did go out, it was usually - you guessed it - alone.

I figured out real quick that loneliness doesn't go away by itself.

I knew that I had to do something different. And FAST.

So I went out to a bar in the area called "Houston's." It was a popular happy-hour spot, and there were always some really good-looking girls there. I was determined to meet these women, because I hadn't had a date in over 2 months (probably longer than that, now that I think about it), and I was starting to go stir-crazy.

I ordered a Budweiser and parked myself at the bar. I looked around to see who there was to meet. (This was a big mistake, and I'll explain why in a minute).

I kept seeing groups of girls come in, and leave, and come in... and leave. And I wasn't approaching any of them. I wanted to, but my mind wasn't giving me anything to say to them.

"The longer I stayed there, the worse it got, because I had NO IDEA where to begin."

How do you just go up and talk to a person you've never met before? I watched lots of other guys walk in, and they seemed to have no problem walking over and talking to women.

Me? I couldn't imagine how to do it, or what the hell to say...

Until later, of course. When you're in your car and on the way home, you suddenly figure out the perfect thing to open up with, even if it was only, "Hey, are you girls having fun?" It could have been that simple, but for some reason you just couldn't do it at the time.

The more times this happens to you, the more emotionally worked-up you get. And each time - when nothing changes - you feel worse and worse about yourself because it feels like you're completely stuck in this infinite loop, like Groundhog Day, only you can't seem to break the cycle...

Okay, let me finish my story about what happened at that bar...

So here I am, and finally, 2 hours and 3 beers later, I decided that I had to do something.

I decided to leave.

BUT, I wasn't going to leave without connecting with at least one woman there.

So I reached into my wallet and pulled out a business card, and I wrote on the back: "I think you're attractive... if you're interested, give me a call sometime."

"I walked over to the first cute girl I saw, and..."

I tapped her on the shoulder, and handed her the card. I said, "Here, I think you dropped this..."

Now, I thought that was pretty darn clever.

But she looked back at me - after first glancing at the front of the card and giggling - and she said, "I don't think so." And then she threw the card over her shoulder on the floor.


That was cold.

I just walked out of there with my tail between my legs and drove home. I remember beating on the steering wheel with my fists, wondering:

"What in the world do I have to do to meet women without going through the pain of rejection like this...???"

I mean, I'd finally overcome my fear for just two seconds to walk up to her, and I still got blown out.

It really does take guts to go up to a woman and talk to her. You have to work your courage up to a fever-pitch before you can do something.

Even if you can get your courage up, there's no guarantee you're going to be successful, either.

I had no idea WHAT to say to women to get them to respond, so I felt like I was in a double-bind. Even if I could get the nerve up, I still didn't know what to say.

"I felt like I was getting in the boxing ring with an opponent that I'd never beat."

My morale had hit an all-time low.

What I ended up doing was going to the local bookstore the next day and looking for books that showed guys how to approach women and meet women.

I found NOTHING on the topic.

Then I started looking at all the dating advice books out there, most of which are written by women to help other women. I found some good ideas in there, but nothing that even came close to helping me overcome this anxiety over approaching women.

These books just talked about "flirting" and stuff like that. I didn't want to flirt - I wanted to MEET women, ATTRACT women. Get myself a hot girlfriend.

So then I went out just about every night I could, watching guys who were good with women and seeing what it was they were doing. I started figuring out how they used lines to open up groups of women and get them interested.

(These weren't those corny "pickup lines" you read about, either. I'm going to talk about those in a minute, too.)

I even joined a dating service, and put an ad in the personals, and created an online dating service profile.

I used every opportunity I could to put together a REAL and EFFECTIVE strategy to get over my fear and start talking to women.

Because there was one thing I had figured out, and it's the one thing you should be aware of right now as you read this:

"If you can't approach women, you can't meet any women."

"And if you can't meet women, you can't possibly get them to go out on a date with you..."

The two work hand in hand.

It's very simple, and logical ... and it took me a LONG TIME to learn that lesson. You see, everything you want to learn to be more successful with women requires you to learn how to approach women - and in the right way.

It goes back to that turning point I talked about before - the point in your head where you will either take action or fade into the background.

Since you're still with me here, I know that you're definitely NOT the kind who wants to disappear into the background.

Now, over those 4 years of intensive research and field work I did to find out how to approach women the right way, I kept notes in a journal. I have pages and pages of notes on what I tried, what worked, what didn't work, and how I overcame the challenges of learning this new skill.

(I still have that notebook to this day. It's all dog-eared and ragged, and I have to use a rubber band to keep the pages in there, but it's packed full of every insight and technique I found.)

But I also found something out that was much more valuable along the way. In fact, I think I'd even call it "priceless."

I noticed that even when I knew WHAT I was supposed to say when I approached a woman, I still had to get past that point in my head where I actually would DO it. Lines don't help with that.

Here's a little test you can use:

On any of your single guy friends, the next time you see an attractive woman in a bar, nudge him and tell him to go talk to her.

I will bet that 19 out of 20 guys will say something like this:

"Nah, she's not my type, dude..."


"I'm not on my game tonight. Maybe later..."

Or any number of lame excuses.

Hey, I used to do the EXACT same thing. And the worst part is that when your friend talks himself out of approaching a woman, you feel relieved because it usually gives you the excuse you need to not go talk to her, either. So you don't push it, and you go back to drinking your beer.

But deep inside, you still really want to meet that woman.

Look, I'm not telling you this stuff to make you feel bad; I just want you to understand just how much of the same experiences I've gone through.

And what I discovered was ...

"There are guys EVERYWHERE with this issue - trying to find the courage to approach a woman and just say 'Hi' to her..."

I wasn't alone.

But even MORE important was that I discovered that there were guys who had figured out how to overcome the problem. They had managed to conquer their fear - and their shy personality - and break through that invisible barrier.

I once heard a phrase that I'd like you to remember: "If he did that, I can do that."

Because I used to think that there was something actually different about these guys, that they had some kind of magical gift. The reality is that they had the exact same brain I have, and they had the same abilities I had.

And I learned that I could actually do better than them when I discovered how it all worked, because these "naturals" were clueless as to what they were doing.

And that means that it's a Skill That ANY Man Can Learn...

I want to let you know that approaching women really is a skill.

I'm sure you've learned to do something pretty good in your life, like play the guitar, or fix cars, or even play a video game better than anyone else.

Well, learning how to talk to women is just like learning one of those skills. At first, you're not too good. But if you just stick with it, you learn faster and faster, and before you know it you're better than most people.

The more you learn, the faster you get better. And it gets easier and easier.

(And the best part is that I've taken all the work and effort out of learning this skill for you.)

And then I also discovered that I became a lot better in social situations, too. I wasn't always the "quiet one" that never talked. I found out how to be a part of conversations instead of just an observer, and I got rid of a lot of the shyness I had. I even figured out how to use my sense of humor with women and not come across as a dork.


5 Mistakes Most Guys Make When They Learn To Approach Women & Pickup Women

So right now I want to share some of the lessons I learned on this journey to improve my skills approaching women. The information I'm about to share with you will probably shave a few months off your learning curve if you really internalize it and let it sink in.

APPROACH MISTAKE #1: Trying to be "friends first" with women.

One of the things I saw myself doing, and I later saw in many other guys, was that we men are so ashamed to show our interest in a woman for fear of being rejected that we'd try to camouflage and hide it behind a false pretense.

The only way we could walk up and talk to a woman was if we convinced ourselves (and the woman) that we weren't doing it for the need to "pickup" on her, or "hit on" her.

It's a fear that I call the fear of being "found out..."

Have you ever used this line on a woman:

"Hey, can you tell me what time it is?"

I have. It was the only way I could get myself to talk to some women.

You may have used that line to just do SOMETHING instead of sit there. But then you have to figure out how to follow that one up, don't you?

What do you say next when she says: "Oh, it's 3:45..." (?)

And so we learned that the "What time is it?" trick wouldn't get us far.

So by trying to be "friends first" with a woman, we think we're actually answering her request. After all, don't most women say they want to be "friends first" before anything else?

But the problem with this is that what a woman is really saying is actually much more complicated, and it wasn't until after I'd talked with a hundred or so women about this, and dug deep to find out what was really happening that I was able to interpret this...

Here's what a woman is really saying when she says: "I want to be friends first..." I'm going to warn you that this is something that almost NO guy out there knows, so keep this information to yourself. You'll cook a lot of brain cells if you try to explain it to a guy who is caught up in his "wussy" ways.

Here's the translation of what she's REALLY saying:

"I want to give you the impression that we need to be friends first so I can see how you'll react to me when I say this.

"If you act frustrated or angry, I'll know that you really only wanted me for one thing, and you couldn't appreciate me as a human being with feelings.

"On the other hand, if you don't react to this and simply demonstrate that you're a confident and sexual man - and act like I'm the sexual woman that I am - I'll want to be much more than just 'friends first.'"

You see, by trying to sneak in the back door of "friends first," you wind up destroying her attraction for you, and it's because you end up WIMPING OUT.

The bigger reason for this is because you were seeking her acceptance and approval before you took action. Almost like you were looking for permission.

After years of learning what it takes to get women genuinely interested in men, and finding out what they were really looking for, I can boil almost all of the problems guys have into this one thing:


You see, most shy guys like us have a need inside to feel accepted by a woman. That we're approved of in her eyes.

I'm sure there's some great psycho-babble out there about how this relates to your 'inner child,' but it doesn't help you learn how to approach women with confidence, so let's leave that out for now...

What women see when a guy tries this friends-first thing is a guy who is saying: "Please-oh-please... Will you approve of me?"

A woman's mind is hard-wired to mistrust a guy who needs her approval, because she wants to know that when push comes to shove, he will be able to point the way.

She wants to feel SAFE around him. And a BIG part of feeling safe for a woman is knowing that she will not be the man in the relationship.

This may sound a bit obvious, but I need to say this for you to really understand:

"Women are not attracted to approval-seeking behavior..."

It's actually repulsive to them. As in: "I just saw naked pictures of my grandma" repulsive.

Yeah, THAT bad.

(This friends-first thing is also what triggers the "Nice Guy" syndrome, by the way.)

Let's move on to the next mistake...

APPROACH MISTAKE #2: Trying to Come up With a Perfect "pickup line" - or Some Other Clever and Impressive Way to Get Her Interested in You...

When I first got started learning how to approach women, I thought it was the first thing you say to a woman that makes her interested in you or not. I thought I had to make this original presentation right up front. I figured you had one chance to make a really big impression on her, or you lost her interest.

What I found in reality is something COMPLETELY different.

The first think you say is actually the LEAST important thing. I found some great conversational openers that would work ALL the time - no chance of rejection.

Here's the amazing fact that most guys don't know:

The most important thing when you approach a woman is not what you first say, it's how sincere and believable you communicate yourself behind those words.

For example, here's one of the openers I use, and other guys I've taught use this almost without fail:

"Hi, I hope you don't mind, but I don't have a clever pickup line. I just wanted to come over and say hello. My name is..."

Read that over again, because the power of what that opening "line" does is incredible.

Let's review what this communicates:

In evolutionary terms, most of your brain evolved to do one task: We need to be able to figure out if someone is being REAL with us. SINCERE.


Because without that basic requirement, any relationship you have based on mistrust or insincerity could cost you.

It all starts with sincerity, which is something women can sense from you within the first few minutes (sometimes SECONDS) of conversation.

And that's why you can't fall into the trap of using phony lines or made-up stories to attract women when you approach, because they'll figure it out no matter how great a "pickup artist" you are.

That's why I created my REAL Game openers to help you be REAL and authentic with women - AND get results.

You never need to lie to attract women.

In fact, another thing I discovered was that instead of trying to find the perfect line or impressive approach, the most successful technique to approach women is simply NOT messing it up!

APPROACH MISTAKE #3: Not having some techniques and tools - a utility belt - to help you.

One of the most important things I observed as I learned how to approach women and get rid of the fear and anxiety was to watch other guys and learn from their mistakes.

I learned A LOT from them. (Thanks, guys...)

And one thing I saw that completely floored me was the fact that guys who were actually relaxed and comfortable with walking up and approaching women were crashing and burning ALL THE TIME.

These guys had what I would have killed to get (I ended up not having to kill for it, luckily...) and they were still messing up their approaches with women.

And then I saw what it was...

These guys had warmth, almost no fear approaching women, but they were missing out on the most important thing...

After I figured it out, I wanted to get some business cards made up with the reason for their failure in big letters on it so I could just hand them out when I saw it happening.

"What Is The One Reason That Most Guys Fail When They Approach Women?"

They had no SYSTEM for what to say, and when to say it.

There was no plan.

No one goes in and tries to put up a building without a blueprint, and you can't afford to go into an interaction with a woman without one, either.

It's vitally important that you know what words work and which ones don't to get women to talk to you, open up to you, trust you, give you her number, get a date with her, and so on.

I'll come back to this after the last mistake...

APPROACH MISTAKE #4: Not qualifying the woman.

Qualifying is the process of figuring out if a woman meets YOUR criteria and requirements, which is something that most guys do not do.

After all, they're in such a hurry to try and hook her in that they aren't thinking about whether they should even want this woman in their life in the first place. They're coming from the DEMAND side of the equation, instead of being the supply she wants so badly.

Think about this for a second, and really take a moment to reflect on your own experience here. Don't you usually go up to a woman thinking about how you can get her to want you? Or how you can show her or prove your value?

Well, a woman needs to do this for you.

The first reason is that when you qualify the woman, she will find you a hundred times more attractive than the other ten guys who tried to buy her a drink in the last ten minutes.

The second reason is that you really do need to feel as if she has something to prove to you.

APPROACH MISTAKE #5: Not having an exit strategy.

When you meet a woman, you need a good plan to get into a conversation first, but you also need a good plan for leaving when things are at a high point.

Have you ever had a great conversation going, but you didn't know how to transition out of it into getting contact information? And you find yourself afraid to end the conversation, and it starts to fizzle out.

Before you lose all that effort, you need to use an "auto-save" feature on your approaches.

You need to have a good idea of when, how, and what to say to leave the conversation with either her phone number or an email address.

(An email address is often a better alternative to a phone number because she will need less trust to give you it. Just be sure you write it down carefully!)

Of course, when you're finishing up the conversation, you are also likely to make another mistake...

BONUS APPROACH MISTAKE #5.8: Asking a woman out too soon.

Oh, I know. I can hear you as you read that one.

"What? I'm not supposed to ask a woman out?"

Well... NO.

You really shouldn't ask a woman out the first time you meet her.

Here's why...

When you ask a woman out right away, you communicate "quick-desperation." I call it this because you look like you are the kind of guy who needs to "lock something in" right away because you're afraid of loss.

As part of your exit strategy, you need to simply go for her phone number or email. There are ways to get a guaranteed date from a phone number, as long as you handle things right.

"Here's How to Silence That Voice of Doubt Forever..."

When I talk to guys about their experience with this fear and shyness, and their desperate desire to fix this part of their lives, one thing comes through: They just want to get rid of that voice of doubt in their heads that stops them from just DOING IT.

I have been working with guys for years now on every aspect of their dating lives. I have also held bootcamps and training programs to take guys into bars and clubs to work on their approaches and get them meeting more women in one night than they have met in the last year. (For some guys, it was the FIRST time they had ever been able to walk up and talk to a woman.)

As I conducted these seminars, I noticed how many similar mistakes guys were making in their approaches, and just how easy it was to fix them.

Who I Am and How I Can Help You...

Now, if you're not familiar with me - Carlos Xuma - or my work, I have been described as one of the original "pickup artists" - just like Neil Strauss discussed in his book The Game. When I spoke at his book signing here in San Francisco, Neil and I both talked about how guys don't really think of me as a "pickup artist" - more like a "guru."

I've never thought of myself as a "guru," either, but if it helps - Hey, no problem.

One of the things I do for men is take them in the field in classes to show them healthy and powerful attraction and approach skills. This has given me the opportunity to observe all the common problems that guys have when they approach women, and I have coached them to help them overcome their "approach anxiety" as well as their "inner game" or confidence issues.

But the real important thing here is that I can now pass along these concentrated lessons and shorten your learning time, the way I have for the guys in my seminars.

Remember that saying? "I did that, so I know I can do this."

You may heard for Carlos Xuma on...
You've seen and heard Carlos Xuma on:
  • ABC & CBS Television
  • David DeAngelo's Interviews with Dating Gurus
  • Playboy Magazine
  • Maxim Radio
  • World Talk Radio
  • "Sex with Emily" radio show
  • "Rock Talk" radio show
  • The Cliff's List Seminar
  • Summum Magazine
  • Neil Strauss' StyleLife Academy for "The Game"


"I want to share with you my complete system - that you can learn in just a few hours - that you can use over and over again to talk to women and approach women right now..."

What I did was take that notebook I told you about, and I pulled the rubber band off, and I went through every page to create a system that would allow any guy to learn how to approach women, and short-cut right past all that pain I had to go through to get there.

If you're finally ready to get rid of that shyness that has been holding you back for so long now, and you want to experience the power and satisfaction of being able to walk up to any woman - anytime and anywhere - and get her interested enough to want to get with you, I've got something that you just might want to see...

I took my notes, along with my approach techniques, and confidence builders, and conversation-starting skills, and I boiled it all down to a rock-solid 4-CD program designed to give you the ability to Approach Women - NOW.

I'm not just talking about a set of lines and techniques here, either.

I really went deep to give you all my best and most powerful methods of re-booting your brain into "approach mode," for good.

This will be embedded in your brain forever, and you won't have to go through all that shy fear again.

You'll learn WHY men are so wired to be afraid of approaching women, and...

"How you can break those "inner game" blockades that have you stuck in that loop of wanting to approach a woman, but never being able to actually ACT."

Then we'll jump right into the specific methodology that will give you the best introductions, the best openers, and the best lines ever to use to get into conversations with women.

And the best part is that I won't just teach you a bunch of lines that will be "found out" or heard by every woman out there by the time you use them.

Listen to this: I'm going to teach you how to create your own material and re-stock your utility belt in almost NO TIME at all. You'll learn how to find your own original and GENUINE method of talking to any woman.

And that's what makes my program so much more effective and necessary for you. This is what makes this program so completely unique and unequaled.

Rather than get a bunch of canned "routines" that will be used up in a couple of weeks once every woman has heard them, you'll get an understanding of how the masters of approach find their openers, their stories, and their powerful conversational ability.

As the saying goes, I'm not just giving you a fish and feeding you for a day... I'm teaching you HOW to fish so that you can feed yourself for a LIFETIME.

Here are some of the things I'll teach you:

There's even more inside this program...

"You're Going to Get My Simple System:
Every Trick, Tactic, Formula,
Shortcut, Strategy and Jealously-Guarded Secret
I've Got in My Arsenal to Approach Women..."


"Take a Look at the Secrets of Approaching Women That You'll Learn in This Digitally Recorded Audio Seminar..."


"This Is The Real Deal..."

Approach Women - NOW! program

This isn't just theory, either.

This is the stuff I used to get past my fear and shyness, and the same approaches I use to get into conversations with women all the time.

This is field-tested and real.

Here's What You Get in "Approach Women - NOW"

In the "Approach Women - NOW!" program, I will give you FOUR information packed CDs of over 280 minutes of hard-core approach advice and motivation. I'll explain all the the principles in easy-to-understand language, with tons of examples.

These techniques and introduction methods work over and over again. After all, if your success isn't repeatable, it's no good.

I'll even help you get your attitude and self-confidence up where it needs to be. No program that shows you how to approach women would be complete without an understanding of how to conquer your inner fears when you talk to women.

Testimonial from James, who learned how to approach girls James finds it to fit any current situation...

"I enjoyed your Approach Women NOW! program! It provided me step-by-step approaches on EVERY single situation. [An] organized, Systematic, structured method that is easy to remember and - most importantly to me - PERSONAL that I can change and modify to fit any current situation. Thank you so much [for] putting this program together!!!"

- James, CA

You are the Bomb!

Testimonial from Darrin K., who learned how to attract women "Let me tell you Carlos that you are a life saver. I just got out of a really bad marriage... I mean bad... no self confidence whatsoever. To the point that I was willing to take the abuse just to stay in it. Luckily she got a boyfriend and kicked me out. That's when I came across your products. I decided to buy the approaching women CD's and let me say they are AWESOME. Those CDs alone have shot my confidence levels way up and made me really start to retrain my brain and regain my confidence. I've already listened to them 5 times and in the next month I'm buying the alpha male program. Needless to say my charming abilities are coming back full force. Thank you so much and keep up the good work."

- Darrin K. - Sacramento, CA

"I've Also Included Exclusive Exercises That Will Show You..."

  • How to build a social network - create a broad and huge social network that will fill your life with women...

  • Observational People Skills - how to increase yours by 100% in just a couple weeks...

  • How to change your core beliefs when you approach women, when you talk to women, and ongoing long-term success with women that will last you the rest of your life...

  • How to use Autogenics to remove anxiety and stay totally calm during the approach...

  • How to create conversations from thin air with anyone you meet - and keep them going for as long as you want...

  • How to remove "approach anxiety" (AKA - Fear of Rejection) with a two-minute exercise you can do anywhere before you go out to meet women - or use it to recharge if you feel low-energy...

  • How to Change Your Identity - Why "you" are a highly fluid concept, and how to take on the attitude and personality YOU want...

  • The right way to track your progress and keep score - and the one tool you must have to improve your ability to approach and attract the women you want...

  • Opening Rituals - How to enter a resourceful state in just a few seconds using the secrets that professional athletes have used for years...

  • The Power of Relaxation - the two skills you can use to get rid of your obsessive worries and fears...

  • Ever said the wrong thing and felt like a dork? Re-connect your mouth to your brain - exercises to stop you from tripping over your own tongue...

"Your Friends Will Envy Your Ability to Approach and Talk to Women - Anywhere, Anytime..."

Would you leave on a trip to somewhere you'd never been before without a plan, a roadmap of the land that lies ahead? Or at least directions to tell you which way to turn?

No way.

Without directions you'll get hopelessly lost.

You might get there by luck, but it will take you ten times longer to find it than if you knew the way in advance.

Or if someone gave you a clear map to go directly to your goal.

If you've ever taken the wrong exit or wrong turn in the area where you live, you know that it's not easy to find your way - even somewhere you think you already know like the back of your hand.

The same thing is true when you learn how to approach women. Just one wrong turn during your approach or in the conversation will doom you to failure. You need to know where you're going!

I used to just go in and "wing it" when I approached women, and I got horrible results. You know it isn't going well when your hands are sweating, your mouth is dried out, and your heart is hammering your ribcage over 100 beats a second.

The best way to stay relaxed and confident during your interaction with a woman is to have a plan. Your plan gives you confidence that no matter what happens, you can flow with it.

That's what this program gives you. An diamond foolproof plan to approach women anywhere you see them. When you have the tools, the work is easier, and you'll find yourself more calm during the approach as a result.


Steve is back in the game...

Steve's Testimonial - he now knows how approaching girls works "After 23 years of marriage, I was quite apprehensive about going back into the dating scene at age 53. Actually, apprehensive is putting it lightly. I was terrified. Your audio coaching programs offered a clear and focused way of approaching women and engaging them in just about any situation. What was at first a anxiety laden experience, was transformed into a fun and successful way of bringing women into my life. In fact, at this point I've got more women than I can handle! I feel like a kid in a candy store! Keep up the great work. Your programs are worth their weight in gold."

- Steve D.


What Every Man Needs to Know -
How to Approach Women and Talk to Women...

Here's What You'll Learn On The 4 Digital Audio CDs

how to approach a women - CD 1
CD #1

Attitude, Psychology, and Motivation

  • How to Motivate Yourself for Success
  • How to Convey the Right Attitude and Posture
  • Overcoming Your Fears and Removing Rejection
  • Preparation to Approach Women
  • Goals and Calibration
  • The Attitude of the Master Approacher

how to approach a women - CD 2
CD #2

Body Language and Exercises

  • How to talk to women, and What Body Language You Can Ignore
  • Reading Energy Levels
  • Reading Body Language Indicators, From Head to Toe
  • Positive and Negative Body Language Signs
  • Proxemics, Mirroring and Pacing
  • Exercises to Improve Your Attitude, Generate Self-Confidence, and Motivate Yourself
  • Controlling Your Mind-Body State

approaching women - CD 3
CD #3

Architecture of the A.I.M. Model - Example Approaches

  • Philosophy and Architecture of Approaching Women
  • The Complete Process to Approach Women
  • Communicating Your Interest
  • Getting through the Layers of Communication
  • Progressive Goals to Approach Women

approaching women - CD 4
CD #4

Example Approaches - Power Tools - Diagnosing Your Problems and Fixing Them

  • Using Applied Skills in Conversation to Drive Up Interest, Trust, and Rapport
  • Sexual Communication
  • Social Proof and High Social Value (HSV)
  • Problems and Solutions When You Approach Women
  • Advanced Skills for Approaching Women
  • References, Resources, and Complete Approach Explanations

ORDER TODAY - and we'll pay the shipping costs for your program anywhere in the United States or Canada...!

MORE examples of Real People Who Have Success With The "Approach Women - NOW!" program...

Satisfied Customer who knows how to attract women "I am so appreciative of your 'Approach Women - NOW!' program. I have learned to assert myself and not accept 2nd class behavior from myself or others and do what I believe is right and not just go along to be accepted. Now I have the courage to go online and send out PROPER emails and not be dependent on the outcome.

"Before starting on these programs, I was like Michael Douglas in [the movie] 'Falling Down.' I let others determine my value and obsessed where I stood with others... as a result I was highly neurotic and was scapegoated and hugely unwelcome wherever I went.

"I now provide my own validation. I'm so happy to have removed myself from the pariah subclass. Thank you very much!!!"

- Chris H., Louisiana

Satisfied Customer who approaches women "I have been listening to your podcasts for the last 2 months and I finally broke down and bought the 'Approach Women Now' program. Boy oh boy is it great!!! My only regret is that I did not come across this sooner! The advice and exercises have elevated my game up to a whole new level and I am using them to help manage my fear of approaching women. Give me a few more weeks to study this information, and watch out ladies! Thanks!!!"

- Will F., Cleveland, OH

He knows how to approach all the girls "The Approach Women Now program is great! It helps a lot... it transmits a good vibe, motivation, confidence and the will to ACT.

"Acting becomes so natural, and the concepts so familiar that you'll have no problem dealing with woman. The yes or no becomes just the result of their attitude, not yours, because you already have a good attitude...

"I've met some interesting new pretty faces and their smiles. I seduce them and they seduce me too. Things are rolling..."

- Manuel C., Portugal

...and this is just the tip of the iceberg. Click here to read more testimonials.

"Listen to what the other gurus have to say about Carlos Xuma's work..."

"If I knew about Carlos Xuma's products earlier in my life, it would have saved me a lot of years... Trust me, Carlos has changed my life -- he can change yours too!"

- Oliver T., CEO - Captivate 2 Connect
"... We're here to say with absolute CERTAINTY that you clearly deserve to be amongst the top 1% within the crowded triangle.... He always OVERDELIVERS in his dating programs and, long story short... his techniques WILL get you the results you want. Period."

- Simon Heong/David K- Publishers: Instant Approaching Secrets,
"Carlos Xuma is a man who has a clear passion for imparting the success with women he has experienced to other guys worldwide. He approaches his craft with immense integrity and a distinct style!"

- Scot McKay, X & Y Communications,
"Carlos Xuma is the REAL DEAL! If you are serious about creating an extraordinary relationship. I highly recommend Carlos to any man who is ready to get the woman of his dreams. I love his game, it's 100% real."

- the dean,
"Carlos Xuma is one of those rare guys in the field who actually GETS what interacting with women is all about. His advice goes beyond the pick-up lines and approach techniques..."

- James Brito, How to Be Irresistible to Women
"Carlos Xuma is one of the few men in the 'seduction' or 'attraction' community who digs beneath the surface of passing attraction, and explores what it is to be a man who attracts women by virtue of his character and, consequently, the natural outward expression of high character..."

- Adam Gilad, CEO -
"Hey Carlos, I write about the biology of men and women's behavior. You seem to know the biology of behavior without knowing it. How do you do that? You have a deep intuition of dynamics - it took me 7 years of academic research to discover. And you find sharp ways to apply it practically... Keep up the good work, brother."

- Joe Quirk, Author of "Sperm are from Men, Eggs are from Women"
"I've read every book and studied every system on dating and seduction. ... Xuma is the best there is at teaching men how to develop their 'inner game.' From there, he'll give you the complete set of tools for approaching women, and life, with absolute confidence and skill. If you're in this game to win it, these are the rules you need to learn."

- Dean Cortez, M.A.C.K. Tactics co-creator
"Carlos Xuma is on the 'dating forefront' of teaching guys in this area and he can help YOU fast-forward your own skills and confidence to get R.E.A.L. results with women."

- Rion Williams,
"I was blown away by how much this guy knows... I highly recommend learning from this man..."

- Jason K.
"Great stuff... Really awesome... this stuff will put all the elements together man... I highly recommend it..."

- Mehow, In-field Insider
"I can tell you that Carlos lives what he teaches... He is genuine, authentic, and very much in tune with people..."

- David Shade, Masterful Lover


The Unique "How to Approach Women, Talk to Women
and Read Body Language" Program...

Approach Women - NOW!

Aproach women program 1 FOUR CD Audio Approach Women Home Study Course with over 4 (FOUR) hours of instruction that will give you clear and concise directions to creating attraction and interest in the women you talk to. No hype. Just results. This is the most UNIQUE program and easy to use program on the market - there is no other single product that deals with this subject with this clarity and quality...
Aproach women program 2 Plus, ACT now and get the Approach Bonus Package...


FIVE valuable bonuses (Valued at $589.85) that I *insist* you keep -- no matter what you decide...

I want to make sure you have EVERYTHING you need to immediately guarantee the success of your approach.

So if you act on or before May 20, 2024, as part of my special offer, I've decided to give anyone who claims a copy of "Approach Woman - NOW!" program FULL ACCESS to the following FIVE Valuable Bonuses...

**  BONUS #1 - Approach Women Reference E-book  **

The bonus e-book is the perfect companion to the audio program, outlining and summarizing the key areas of Carlos' approach style.

The book lists the "rules of engagement" for you to get the maximum benefit from the audio and exercises. You'll even get "power tools" to enhance every encounter with a woman into a hot and steamy romance...
  • The rules of body language
  • Topics for conversation
  • Closing phrases
  • How to demonstrate humor
  • Special learning resources to consult after you've finished the program
The e-book lists the architecture and overview of the approach types, and word-for-word approaches for almost every situation you could find yourself in. Carlos has even included his favorite, qualifiers, lead-in questions, challenges, and tests. And, to cap it off, he's included his favorite motivational material to keep you on the path no matter what!
Value: $49.97

**  BONUS #2 - Approach Coach Audio-zine  **

Have you ever gotten discouraged? Every guy has. Now can you imagine how great it would be to get regular coaching and motivation from Carlos after you've completed the Approach women NOW program?

For one year after your order, you'll receive a regular update from Carlos giving some of his best approaches and tactics for meeting women - anywhere & anytime!

The audio segments are digitally recorded MP3 files that you can listen to at home, at work, on your iPod or MP3 player, or burn them to a CD and play on any stereo. You'll get the latest and greatest tips on how to get women interested in you using Carlos' proven strategies.
Value: $129.97

**  BONUS #3 - Access to the Podcast Archives  **

For over 8 months now, Carlos has been producing a critically acclaimed weekly podcast. Every Sunday, a new segment is available online - but you could only access the past 3 or 4 podcasts. The rest were taken offline.

Now, through this special one-time offer, you can get the first 30 podcasts Carlos has made, since the first day! This is over 30 minutes in each audio segment, giving you all kinds of great information on meeting women, getting the right level of confidence, handling dating challenges, and everything you could want to know about women and dating.

That's over 15 HOURS of archived and rare audio from Carlos, and it's available to you for *FREE with this package*!
Value: $229.97

**  BONUS #4 - Top 10 Q&A E-book  **

Carlos' hand-picked Q&A from some of his most common questions. Here, Carlos goes into the various situations a guy will find himself in when interacting with women, including:
  • The Three Success Attitudes and how to demonstrate them to women
  • Closing - how to get your goals and desires with women
  • How to handle dating a woman that's unavailable
  • How to challenge a high-quality woman
  • Why you stay obsessed with certain women
  • How to handle your reputation with women
  • How to get rid of nervousness
  • How to date many women at the same time
  • and much more!
These questions outline the secret mindset of the master seducer and approach artist through examples and detailed explanations of strategies and tactics. This e-book is your ticket to unplugging from the Matrix and installing the beliefs of an Alpha Man!
Value: $49.97

**  BONUS #5 - Unlimited access to the Alpha Power Forum  **

With your purchase of the "Approach Women - NOW!" Program, you not only have the experience of our program, but you'll get immediate access to our members-only message board and join an exclusive group of like-minded individuals on the same path to success with women. It's just like the Master-Mind group that Carlos talks about in the programs.

In the Alpha Power Forum, you will be able to:
  • Join discussions with other single guys learning dating and seduction skills.
  • Get general advice on social dynamics and specific advice for attracting women.
  • Get answers to all of your seduction and pick-up related questions.
  • Have access to all of the latest dating concepts and techniques.
  • Locate and hook up with wingmen in your area.
  • Learn about Seduction Lairs and find out how to join them.
  • Continue your progress and get peer support.
  • Have personal contact with all instructors, including me.
  • Get access to exclusive Field Reports from Carlos and other students and learn all of the newest concepts and techniques in the field of social dynamics.
Value: $129.97

**  BONUS #6 - FREE Evaluation Call from a Certified PickUp 101 Senior Instructor!  **

PickUp 101As part of a special arrangement I've made with Lance Mason and Pickup 101, I want to offer you a very special bonus. Every weekend, Lance Mason & Pickup 101's crack team of instructors are out in bars, supermarkets, and cafe�s perfecting and demonstrating their bullet-proof attraction techniques so they can provide you with the best dating tips and advice available. Just like what I teach, it's FAST and it GETS RESULTS.

Lance Mason, Founder of Pickup 101You probably know Lance from my interviews and other work we've done together. And since I'm putting my bootcamp work on hold for the moment, I needed someone who could do this for you and someone I could trust. Lance is that guy.

Now, some guys are skeptical and want to know why they're giving away a free evaluation call, especially with experienced instructors who spend most of their time leading large workshops.

There are a few important reasons:
  • This is a limited-time offer, so not everyone who visits this page has access to the offer. Quite honestly, this offer is only possible because I know they can take the offer off of our website at any time when they get too busy.
  • Second of all, some guys can get overwhelmed by all the information on dating and "pickup" that's available, and have trouble sorting through what might get results for them.
  • Thirdly, we're all here to learn and grow, and we enjoy helping guys' progress in the fastest, easist way possible.
In the evaluation calls, these instructors can get to the heart of some of your challenges with women, and help you evaluate an appropriate course of action moving forward. And if PickUp 101's not the best one to help out with your particular situation, they'll tell you that too.

That means you won't have to waste tons of time and money on programs that won't ultimately help you to achieve your goal in the fastest way possible.

Signing up for a one-on-one Evaluation Call is easy, IF you're fast.

You see, even though Lance & I are such good friends, I pretty much had to wrestle the guy down to get him to agree to give away these evaluation calls, but he finally gave up & agreed to help you all out.

But it comes with a catch: Lance has only agreed to do 100 Evaluation Calls, so if you wait too long to sign up, you're out of luck! If you miss your chance to schedule a call, I cannot guarantee you will have a chance to reschedule.

Remember, spots are filling up quick, and I can't say when we might have the time to reach out to guys on a one-on-one basis like this again.

Value: $147.00


Your 90-Day DOUBLE Risk-Free Guarantee

Of course, you don't have to decide now. If you order today, you won't have to pay for 30 days. I'll take ALL the risk for you.

DatingDynamics' 100% Guarantee! Protection #1: If you're not absolutely thrilled, just return the CDs in re-saleable condition within 90 days for a complete 100% refund. No questions. No hassles.

Protection #2: Even if you cancel, your efforts won't be for nothing. You'll get to keep the FIVE Valuable Bonuses as my way of saying "Thanks." That's a guaranteed gain, no matter what you decide!

...I literally take ALL of the risk for you because that's how much I believe in this program.


I'm currently offering a temporary 10% discount to EVERYONE who tries this program TODAY...

Instead of paying the full price of 54.97 over two months you will pay ONLY 49.97 per month.

AND you don't have to pay me for 30 DAYS.
I'll take ALL the risk for you.

But be aware that this offer may soon expire, so hurry up and claim your copy of "Approach Women - NOW!" today and get this 10% discount...


Start Approaching Women In The Next 5 Minutes --

There's nothing more important than learning the art and science of approaching women with a style they can't resist - there's no excuse for letting this opportunity slip through your fingers. Even if you're a little short on cash at the moment, I've made special arrangements for you to get this program.

Life is way too short to waste precious time hoping to stumble on the woman of your dreams. It just won't happen. Why not get the knowledge now and enjoy the rest of your life reaping the rewards?

You won't listen to the CDs just once, I guarantee it. You'll use them as a reference for every time you want to approach a woman, and you'll be prepared and ready.

Approach Women - NOW! The next move is up to you. Click here to get "Approach Women - NOW!" program at 2 monthly payments of just 49.97 (10% discount included).

And, don't forget -- if you ORDER TODAY , your "Approach Women - NOW!" program will include FIVE Valuable Bonuses: (Totaling $589.85)
  1. Approach Women Reference E-book ($49.97 value)
  2. Approach Coach Audio-zine ($179 value)
  3. Access to the Podcast Archives ($229.97 value)
  4. Top 10 Q&A E-book ($49.97)
  5. Unlimited access to the Alpha Power Forum ($129.97 Value)

All for only 2 payments of 49.97.

You have an iron-clad 90 day trial period for the "Approach Women - NOW!" program. Listen to every CD carefully... use the techniques... and see exactly how much these techniques work for you.

Act now -- and claim the FIVE Valuable Bonuses (valued at $589.85 but yours FREE).

Click here to buy!

Pay with PayPal

Wishing you confidence and total success with women,

Carlos Xuma - signature

P.S.: Don't Be TRICKED into thinking: "This can't work for ME..."

Obviously, some things don't change too much. Contrary to popular belief, relations between men and women haven't changed for a few thousand years. Yes, there is feminism out there, but the basic chemistry and approach for women is still very much the same.

Yet, despite this, only a TINY fraction of men know how to approach women and attract them (as women want us to).

Remember - if you keep going on the path you are now, without any guidance, you may never figure out the secrets I've unlocked to approaching women. It took me years to figure this all out, and you can learn it in just minutes. Take this tremendous step toward getting this area of your life taken care of - once and for all!


P.P.S. Remember that you get all the bonuses FREE with this offer - even if you decide you don't want the program and return it.

This is better than your money back, because you still come out ahead with this offer no matter what you do. In fact, the only way you lose is if you don't do anything.

Just click this button to get the "Approach Women - NOW!" program, your CD shipment on your 90-day trial: (please give the order page up to 10 seconds to load)

Click here to buy!

Pay with PayPal

NOTE: If you would like to order using PayPal or by mail, Click Here. (The free 30-day trial is only available with debit or credit cards).

If you have any questions about the Approach Women - NOW! program, just email us by clicking HERE.

If you have any technical problems with our website or your order, just send an email to us HERE and we'll get back to you with an answer.

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